Thursday, August 19, 2010

As skeptical as I was about camp this year, it turned out to be incredible. It was definitely a summer of learning that it's not all about me. I feel like my whole life has been directed by whatever I feel like I should do. Have I felt the Holy Spirit tugging at me? Yes. Have I always listened? No. This summer was an example to me of what complete submission to the Holy Spirit looks like. There are blessings and freedom that come from putting your complete trust in the Lord. Submitting control is something that was a BIG lesson this summer. Submitting control for campfires. Submitting control for programming. Submitting control for conversations with campers. Those words were not my own. They were not for my glory, but for the glory of the Lord.

Also, I saw how I continually put God in this box. I have a problem and I limit the ways that he can work. He can only solve this problem by A, B, or C. Nothing else. Nada. What?! Who am I to limit the power of the creator God? His power and greatness is far greater than I can even begin to comprehend. So this summer I challenged myself and my campers to let God out of the box. To release these expectations and submit ourselves to God to be used in mighty ways. And there is fruit in that. The Lord is so good.

So I'm back from camp and as usual there is an Indiana shaped whole in my heart. I miss it. On the last night of camp, Lydia and I rode around the 2 mile loop around camp on a golf cart. Great conversations happen of golf carts, in case you didn't know. We started crying as we talked about our memories of SpringHill. What if this is our last year? What if we never spend another summer at Springhill? As I have been thinking about it, if this was my last summer at camp, I would be satisfied. I have left feeling a sense of calm about life. I have left with this passion and desire to love kids where they are at in life, despite what the world tells me. I have this passion to share Christ's love. SpringHill has allowed me to grow up in so many ways. Yes, I can't imagine a summer without SpringHill. My heart will BREAK when that time comes. I can't be sure of what the future holds. Honestly, it's just another chance to submit control to God and let him be the author of my future.